Larry James' CelebrateIntimateWeddings BLOG

Monday, June 1, 2015

Pay Attention to the “KISS!”

“You may now kiss the bride” (or as I usually say, “You may now seal your promises with a kiss!) raises the question: “How do we kiss?”

WEDKissDataThere are few kisses more important and more meaningful than your first one as a married couple. It is a passionate moment that should symbolize the love you share. Filled with romance and hope, that first kiss clinches the lifelong vows you have just pledged.

Your friends and your family are all there to witness this PDA (public display of affection), so what’s okay? A modest peck, or a full-on whopper now that you’re finally husband and wife?

To be honest, it’s up to YOU. It’s your wedding day – if there has to be an excuse for PDA (Public Displays of Affection), today is that day. Whether you keep it low-key and save it for the wedding night, or go all out, everyone will be happy for you.

From my point of view a “modest peck” doesn’t cut it. My advice to the bride and groom is two things:

1. Practice the ceremony kiss. Otherwise it may appear awkward. Remember the day he proposed, and you saw the ring and the tears in his eyes, and then you two started making out like maniacs? Yeah, don’t do that! Practice will definitely help so that your kiss will look natural and spontaneous. The bride needs to know if you will will include a “dip” and you should decide before hand which direction you’ll tilt your heads.

2. Hold the kiss a little longer than normal. Why? Photographers often miss this photo opt if you exchange a modest peck. Hold it until it begins to feel a little uncomfortable… usually about 5 seconds. It should not be too short since you want to capture the emotions of the moment, but it should not last so long that your guests get fidgety. Close your eyes. Embracing or holding hands is also a good idea. A 20-second workout for your tongues isn’t called for. No sloppy make-out sessions, please! 😉

…OR… “Otherwise it may appear awkward.”

…And into the future. Kiss often. Smooching actually reduces stress! Kissing is also good for dental hygiene, and since French kissing uses all 34 facial muscles, passionate sessions on the sofa can burn 6.4 calories per minute.

BONUS Articles: The (sometimes) Awkward First Kiss
“You May Now Seal Your Promises With a Kiss!”
“You may now seal your promises with a kiss!”
Last Kiss… Before the First Kiss!

CelebrateIntimateWeddings

Wedding Website!

Copyright © 2015 – Larry James. This information is adapted from Larry’s Wedding Website and Wedding Blog. Larry James is a non-denominational minister and performs the most “Romantic” wedding ceremony you will find anywhere! Every wedding ceremony is customized to your complete satisfaction. Call to check availability: Cell: 480-205-3694. You will find more than 475 pages of Wedding ideas, tips (90 tips and growing), ceremonies, and more at: http://www.celebrateintimateweddings.com. Check Larry’s availability.

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NOTE: All articles, “LoveNotes” and wedding tips listed in this Wedding BLOG – written by Larry James – are available for reprint in magazines, periodicals, newsletters, newspapers, eZINEs, on the Internet or on your own Website. Click here for details.

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Wednesday, June 19, 2013

The (sometimes) Awkward First Kiss

Practicing the “first kiss” at your wedding will not make it perfect but it may make it memorable. There are few kisses more important and more meaningful than your first one as a married couple. Planning the perfect kiss in advance nixes problems before they even have a chance to materialize.

firstkissBeckyBrownIt is a Western custom for a newly married couple to exchange a kiss at the conclusion of their wedding ceremony. Some Christians hold the belief that the kiss symbolizes the exchange of souls between the bride and the groom, fulfilling the scripture that “the two shall become one flesh.” However, some trace the tradition to an ancient Roman tradition, whereby the exchange of a kiss signified the completion of a contract. (Source: Wikipedia)

There is no right or wrong way to kiss on your wedding day. A couple’s first kisses as husband and wife is supposed to be gentle, tender, intimate and romantic. A quick peck doesn’t suit the occasion. Neither does a prolonged lip-lock session. It should not be too short since you want to capture the emotions of the moment, but it should not last so long that your guests get fidgety.

You may feel a little self-concious, overwhelmed or shy but this kiss is special and it should be practiced prior to its appearance in the wedding ceremony. You talk about everything else about the wedding, from the guest list to the bridesmaids’ dresses. It’s time to talk about the first kiss.

People love the first kiss and they have definite opinions about how a couple should seal their promises. Most people regard the first kiss as a joyful start of the marriage. Some want passion; some don’t. Some like staged moments; others want to keep things natural. Everyone wants the kiss to be heartfelt and romantic. There’s nothing wrong with a bit of passion between newlyweds, however, if there are children present… keep it PG!

Most couples have a lot of practice kissing. Because of the importance if “this” kiss, you might want to put in a little practice time, especially if you’re doing something you’re not used to, like having the groom dip the bride.

An informal poll of members of The Knot found that just a third of the 71 respondents planned to practice the kiss. Most – 61 percent – said they’ll go with whatever they’re feeling at the moment.

“I have also seen every kiss and act of affection imaginable between bride and groom at the altar: A peck on the cheek, a hug, a fist bump, a long kiss on the lips, a series if kisses on the mouth, a full open-mouth tongue kiss, kissing through tears of joy, and kissing so passionately that friends and loved one scream, “get a room.” ~ Rev. Laurie Sue Brockway

When consulting a couple about their wedding ceremony I always recommend that the first kiss needs to be held a little longer than usual. If the groom goes for a quick peck on the lips the kiss can seem cold, and disappointing and most important of all, it may be missed by the photographer. Holding it just a few seconds longer than necessary is important so the kiss will not be missed. Most importantly, it should feel right to both of you. You may hear a guest shout, “Get a room!” but at least the kiss will be remembered. Some photographers recommend a five-second to seven-second kiss, which should be plenty of time to snap a frameable shot without making everyone around you uncomfortable.

firstkissEmilyBlakeAt my wedding ceremonies, I usually say, “You may now seal your promises with a kiss!” Once the Wedding Officiant announces the kiss…

• Pause, then look at each other and allow yourself to smile

• Make eye contact with each other until you kiss and close your eyes

• Do something with your hands. When your hands are motionless, you don’t look like you’re truly enjoying the kiss

• Decide which way you will tilt your head to avoid bumping noses

• Keep your mouth closed for the most part – a partial smile is always nice

• Hold it for five to seven-seconds so the photographer can get a variety of photos from full body to close up

• Pull apart slowly afterwards and feel free to show some emotion throughout

• Go for a short second kiss if you enjoyed it!

It’s nerve-racking enough to kiss in front of dozens of guests whose eyes are glued on you. I’m not suggesting a “rehearsed” kiss, however, knowing in advance how you are going to do your first kiss will help make things easier. Like anything else in the ceremony, having a sense of how you would like to kiss and be kissed can relieve any “performance” pressure.

Future Reference Fact: Smooching actually reduces stress – something every woman planning a wedding needs. Kissing is also good for dental hygiene, and since French kissing uses all 34 facial muscles, passionate sessions on the sofa can burn 6.4 calories per minute. 😉

BONUS Article: Need Some Lip Lessons?
Creating Wedding Kiss Perfection
The Romantic Kiss

NOTE: If you are at the office… turn down the sound!

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Click for Larry’s Wedding Website!

Copyright © 2013 – Larry James. Larry James is an award winning, non-denominational wedding officiant and performs the most “Romantic” wedding ceremony you will find anywhere! Every wedding ceremony is customized to your complete satisfaction. Call to check availability: 480-998-9411 or Cell: 480-205-3694. Pre-maritial relationship coaching is available and not required. You will find more than 475 pages of Wedding ideas, tips (96 tips and growing), ceremonies, and more at: http://www.celebrateintimateweddings.com. Something NEW about weddings is posted every 4th day on this Wedding BLOG. Check Larry’s availability.

Subscribe to Larry’s FREE monthly “LoveNotes for Lovers” eZINE. Contact: CelebrateIntimateWeddings.com, P.O. Box 12695, Scottsdale, AZ 85267-2695. – CelebrateIntimateWeddings.com

NOTE: All articles, “LoveNotes” and wedding tips listed in this Wedding BLOG – written by Larry James – are available for reprint in magazines, periodicals, newsletters, newspapers, eZINEs, on the Internet or on your own Website. Click here for details.

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Thursday, December 15, 2011

“You May Now Seal Your Promises With a Kiss!”

Filed under: First Kiss — Larry James @ 8:00 am

first-kissHave you thought much about your first kiss as wife and husband? It’s the kiss that seals the deal. In my interviews with brides and grooms most are more excited about other aspects of the weddings than the first kiss.

Some say the kiss is considered a symbolic act of sharing each others spirit as the couple each breathes in a portion of their new mate’s soul. It is a Western custom for a newly married couple to exchange a kiss at the conclusion of their wedding ceremony.

Some trace the tradition to an ancient Roman tradition, whereby the exchange of a kiss signified the completion of a contract. Although the kiss is not a “formal” requirement of the ceremony, most regard the gesture as a joyful start of the marriage. Today, the kissing of the bride signifies that the marriage ceremony is complete and that the couple is now wife and husband.

dippingKISSNo more quick pecks! This intimate, momentous moment occurs in front of all your friends and family and should be memorable. First of all, make it last a little longer than you think is necessary. Why? Because the photographer does not know when the kiss is coming and you want to be sure they get that photo. I always tell the bride and groom that I will let the photographer know that I’ve asked them to hold the kiss.

There is another good reason to make it last. The guests love it. Someone may shout, “Get a room!”

It’s okay to share a bit of the passion you have for each other for more than a brief second. It doesn’t matter whether it’s a dip kiss, a short and sweet kiss, or a lingering kiss. Do what makes you feel comfortable. However a sloppy wet, tongue-in-mouth kiss might be a bit much for the grandmas and grandpas on your guest list.

By the way, the bride and groom have their choice of having me say, “You may now kiss the bride,” (the traditional way) or “You may now seal your promises with a kiss” (the Larry – and more “romantic” way)! 😉

BONUS Article: Last Kiss. . . Before the First Kiss!

Photo Credit: (Seaside kiss) – Aaron Polhill Photography

Copyright © 2011 – Larry James. This idea is adapted from Larry’s “romantic” Wedding Website. Larry James is an award winning, non-denominational wedding officiant and performs the most “Romantic” wedding ceremony you will find anywhere! Every wedding ceremony is customized to your complete satisfaction. Call to check availability: 480-998-9411 or 800-725-9223. Pre-maritial relationship coaching is available and not required. You will find more than 470 pages of Wedding ideas, tips (90 tips and growing), ceremonies, and more at: http://www.celebrateintimateweddings.com. Something NEW about weddings is posted every 4th day on this Wedding BLOG. Check Larry’s availability.

Subscribe to Larry’s FREE monthly “LoveNotes for Lovers” eZINE. Contact: CelebrateIntimateWeddings.com, P.O. Box 12695, Scottsdale, AZ 85267-2695. – CelebrateIntimateWeddings.com

NOTE: All articles, “LoveNotes” and wedding tips listed in this Wedding BLOG – written by Larry James – are available for reprint in magazines, periodicals, newsletters, newspapers, eZINEs, on the Internet or on your own Website. Click here for details.

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