Larry James' CelebrateIntimateWeddings BLOG

Thursday, February 5, 2015

The Seven Year Itch Explained

Filed under: Wedding Tips — Larry James @ 7:30 am

The seven year itch is the psychological theory that happiness in couples starts to deteriorate after seven years together, increasing the chances of a break-up. It is the point when you have been together so long that you are tired and/or bored with your partner, but you have not been together long enough to have accepted the rhythm that is being in a relationship. Some people miss being single and would like a different partner. Other people just miss the freedom of being single and having no strings attached but they do not want another partner. It is a “rough” patch in a relationship and supposedly comes in the seventh year of marriage.

WED7YearItchThis phase is a very trying time, which could either make or break a relationship. I, for one, realize that relationship issues do occur, however I believe that the seven year itch is a myth made popular in 1955 when Marilyn Monroe starred in a movie of the same name. Psychologists and therapists say the concept of the seven-year itch, popularly thought to be a stage in the seventh year of marriage characterized by unsettled feelings and the urge to have an affair or leave the marriage, is part truth, part myth. When you really love each other there are many things you can do to move forward together. When all amateur moves have failed, it may be advisable for you to visit a relationship coach.

Vivian Diller, on The Seven Year Itch: Clearly, there are many factors that contribute to a couple’s growing dissatisfaction during the early phase of a relationship. To reduce it to the loss of attractiveness is obviously too simplistic. These first seven years are often filled with starting families, building careers and firming the marital foundation.

Young couples have a lot on their minds. But they cannot dismiss the role that feeling attracted to one another plays in the success of their long term relationship. The key is incorporating this awareness into everything else that we know about how couples succeed, or don’t, in today’s culture.

BONUS Article: Maintaining Attraction in Long-Term Relationships
The Itch is a Myth
Seven-Year Itch Isn’t About Years but the Relationship
Seven Strategies To Help Avoid The 7-Year Itch!
6 Tips To Deal With The 7-Year Itch

Copyright © 2015 – Vivian Diller. Vivian Diller, Ph.D. is a psychologist in private practice in New York City. She serves as a media expert on various psychological topics and as a consultant to companies promoting health, beauty and cosmetic products. Her book, Face It: What Women Really Feel As Their Looks Change (2011), edited by Michele Willens, is a psychological guide to help women deal with the emotions brought on by their changing appearances.

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