Alexis Asbe, Guest Author
Whether you are fixing to marry the person of your dreams or simply trying to get through your day, there are inevitably times (often moment-to-moment) when you need to make a choice. Does that sound like a cliché? Well, simple, powerful truths often come disguised that way.
Choosing is like ordering a “Meal Deal.” For example, Meal Deal #1 is choosing to be positive, and Meal Deal #2 is choosing NOT to (which can put you anywhere between numb and negative). The benefits of Meal Deal #1 are endless. The side effects of Meal Deal #2 can be harmful to your health.
Here are just some of the benefits when you choose the “positively” delicious (sorry, couldn’t resist the pun) Meal Deal #1:
Adding a Side of Optimism
So what’s not to be happy about? You only have an average of 160 things to do when planning a wedding… and how many hours are there in a day… and how many days until the big one?
The feeling of “overload” and its buddy “emotional stress” WILL sneak up on you. Don’t be surprised. Count on it! And when these guys show up, be ready to flip them off with a good dose of positiveness. (Yes, it’s a word… I just made it up!)
Now, don’t get me wrong. You don’t have to walk around with a big cheesy smile on your face to be an optimist. Optimism is simply a choice to see something differently than what may seem obvious. Instead of dwelling on the tiny details, you can choose to look at the bigger picture, which may give you a better view of what is possible. After all, you are in love, and ordering up a side of optimism will only enhance the view.
Sprinkle Laughter on Top
Planning a wedding is associated with over-the-top stress. In addition to your already busy life, you now have an unbelievable “To-Do” list, a looming deadline, and a limited budget. Finding humor while attacking your daily “To-Do” list, and actually laughing, are two of the best remedies for defusing stress. Not only will laughter ease the tension (yours and that of those around you), its healthy side effects will help support your body’s immune and circulatory systems… and the endorphins that a little chuckle releases into your body can’t help but improve your overall happiness. So, sprinkle a little laughter on your “To-Do” list and call me in the morning.
Building the Optimist Muscle
The practice of being positive is like building a muscle (hey, stay with me, those of you who hate exercise). It takes time, repetition, and requires a consistent supply of protein. While you are out and about tackling that “To-Do” list, try to stop at least 3 to 5 times in the day to check in with yourself. This is a great source of “protein.” Be aware of your self-talk. Are you on autopilot, with your wings tilting towards overwhelm or negativity? Are you looking for (drum roll…next pithy cliché…) the silver lining in every situation, or have you slid into having less than wonderful, be your expectation?
Sometimes, when we are rushing around, focused on accomplishment, we don’t see all the magnificence right in front of us. If you stop, take some deep breaths, look around and acknowledge each simple joy and accomplishment (yes, each and every one), you will be a muscle-bound optimist before you know it!
Two Scoops of Gratitude to Go, Please
Being thankful is like two giant scoops of ice cream. Everyone likes it. It tastes soooo good! It’s easy to swallow, and goes well with everything. While planning for your big day, remember that without a grateful heart, the “bigness” of the day will be diminished. After all, gratitude turns rejection into approval, confusion into direction, and misperception into transparency. When we are transparent we are vulnerable. When we are vulnerable we can devour all the richness of being in love… And that, my friend, is what will sustain you and your chosen one through the rest of your lives together.
Peace, love and hungry… Ally
Larry’s Book Review: “At the Alter in Your Underwear” is a fun book to read. You’ll find some of the best and most practical advice I’ve ever read about weddings. Get a good chuckle from Chapter 8! Ally Asbe’s words will assist brides in having less stress and fewer anxieties about the big day. Best read with a yellow highlighter!”
Copyright 2013 Alexis Asbe. Alexis “Ally” Asbe has designed and consulted for over 3000 weddings and events. She is the bestselling author of “At the Altar in Your Underwear: 40 secrets to an amazing wedding and a better you!” She is currently a consultant, writer and speaker devoted to styling your heart, your life and soon to be your best friend… Get in your underwear with her at AllyAsbe.com.
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