Larry James' CelebrateIntimateWeddings BLOG

Sunday, October 14, 2012

Mix Up Your Bridal Party!

If you like to be the one to get the attention of your wedding guests by being a little non-traditional, this tip is for you. These days pretty much anything is acceptable.

Brides, who says your maid of honor must be a “maid” or “matron?” If your best pal happens to be a guy, have a “man of honor.” Same goes for the best man; there’s no reason why there can’t be a “best woman.” Bride’s men and Groom’s maids!

best_man_woman t-shirtTypically the bridesmaids stand to the right of the wedding officiant and the groomsmen stand on the left, facing the guests. To further mix things up, how about having every other person be a man, woman, man, women, etc. When the master of ceremonies announces the bridal party, he/she could say something like this: Here is the Maid of honor, “Sally,” being escorted, not by the best man, but the “best woman”, Bills childhood friend, Ms. Candy Smith.” She can also be referred to as “Best Friend of Honor to the groom.”

You could use gender-neutral terms. Bridesmaids and groomsmen become “attendants” and the best man and maid/matron of honor are the “honor attendants.”

You could have all men or all women in the bridal party. You could call them bridesmen and and specify a man of honor. There is no reason you can’t have a best woman too. I had a wedding several years ago where the bride had a guy on her side and the groom had a girl on his side. You could call the man a bridesman, not a bridesmaid.

boygirlboygirlHmmm. What should they wear? If a guy is a bridesmen, to differentiate between him and the groomsmen, you could try to match him to both the bride and bridesmaids – cream/white pants and a blue satin shirt. Bride’s men often wear the same suit as the groomsmen but with a different buttonhole flower and slightly different color tie.

Others say he should match the other groomsmen, and stand with them – not the bridesmaids. Perhaps the person standing beside the bride as she gets married should be the person she’s closest too, not necessarily the female she’s closest too. It may partly depend on how formal the wedding is. I say it’s a matter of personal choice.

But what will the guests say? Weddings are becoming less “traditional” and more and more on the “creative” side. The guests will be talking about how different your wedding was… they say that about my ceremonies already. Doesn’t bother me. 😉

There doesn’t have to be even numbers of boys on the boys side, and girls on the girls side. What if you have more bridesmaids than groomsmen? Simple. Arrange it so that they will all standing together, boy-girl-boy-girl-boy. People are choosing the people who matter and moving further from tradition to make things more interesting. Different is good!

Then there is the idea that the bride and the groom should be the center of attention at a wedding. It’s the bride and groom who will make the choice. It’s their wedding and they can do anything they want. By the way, the groomsmen and bridesmaid do not have to be partnered. And the bridesmaids can wear their favorite dress instead of the common all dress alike uniforms.

Choose to make your wedding unique to you. As long as it is special to you, that should be your only concern. There is no need to choose your bridal party because of other people’s feelings, just choose who you want, regardless of gender. Again, it’s a matter of personal choice.

BONUS Articles: Groomsmen: How to be as Suave as James Bond at the Wedding
Who (of the bridal party) Walks Down the Aisle First?

Copyright © 2012 – Larry James. This idea is adapted from Larry’s “romantic” Wedding Website. Larry James is an award winning, non-denominational wedding officiant and performs the most “Romantic” wedding ceremony you will find anywhere! Every wedding ceremony is customized to your complete satisfaction. Call to check availability: 480-998-9411 or Cell: 480-205-3694. Pre-maritial relationship coaching is available and not required. You will find more than 470 pages of Wedding ideas, tips (90 tips and growing), ceremonies, and more at: Something NEW about weddings is posted every 4th day on this Wedding BLOG. Check Larry’s availability.

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