To honor a loved one who has died, place a lit candle or a single “white” rose in a vase on the alter or guest table to represent the presence of the deceased. Some choose to display a photo.
A moment of silence or a special prayer during the ceremony are other ways to reflect on the loved one. In your ceremony program, mention the person or people by name.
In my wedding ceremony it is said this way:
Minister: Join with me as we bow our heads to observe a moment of silence to honor the memory of those who are not with us today, but are here in spirit. (Pause briefly) Amen.
Mentioning their name(s) during the ceremony is not recommended. This happened at a ceremony once where a distant relative had died many years ago and their name was not called. Several guests complained because the couple didn’t mention an aunt who had died when the bride was a little girl and was much too young to remember her.
NOTE: If either of the Bride or Groom’s mother or father (or Grandparents) are deceased, a nice gesture is to have the Bride or a Groom lay a “white” rose on an empty chair. Presenting a white rose indicates that someone has passed on. Red roses are for the living.
A white rose to honor a deceased mother or father A symbolic gesture with a white rose may be preferable, instead of a spoken remembrance. If you must mention names, it’s wise to only mention the names of parents or grandparents. A reading or mentioning departed loveone’s names can get very emotional. If the loss is recent, it may be difficult for, not only the Bride and Groom, but for family, friends and guests.
All roses symbolize Love, but their colors have special meaning. Use the list below to choose the shade that best matches the feeling you want to convey.
Red – Love, passion, respect and courage
White – innocence, purity, secrecy, reverence and to honor those who are deceased
Yellow – Joy, friendship and freedom
Pink – Happiness, gratitude, appreciation and admiration
Cream – Thoughtfulness, charm and graciousness
Orange – Admiration, fascination, enthusiasm and desire
Also honor the living. Here’s a great way to pay special tribute to both mothers on the day of your wedding.
Read: Honor Your Mother.
Copyright © 2009 – Larry James. This idea is adapted from Larry’s Wedding Website. Larry James is a non-denominational minister and performs the most “Romantic” wedding ceremony you will find anywhere! Every wedding ceremony is customized to your complete satisfaction. Call to check availability: 480-998-9411 or 800-725-9223. You will find more than 445 pages of Wedding ideas, tips (90 tips and growing), ceremonies, and more at: http://www.celebrateintimateweddings.com. Check Larry’s availability.
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